Monday, September 15, 2008

A fashionable new trend

“Yes dear?”
“Why dya have that piece a paper inya pants?”
“It’s a packet of seeds that I didn’t want to leave in the garden to get soggy and these stupid pa……trousers don’t have any pockets.”
“Stoopid is a banned word! 25 cents please!”
“Oh very well. Here you got. Pop it in the jar.”

“Yes dear?”
“Why do you have a lighter tucked into the top of your trousers?”
“Because I need a lighter for the tea lights but a lighter is a dangerous thing around here and I haven’t found a safe place to hide it yet, somewhere that I can remember where I hid it more to the point. And these stupid trousers don’t have any pockets.”
“Language mother dearest. Language!”

“Yes dear?”
“What it is being?”
“Which bit?”
“Er……dah bumpy fings on yur tummy.”
“Pop beads, they slipped a bit from the waistband of my trousers. I picked up in the garden even though they’re ‘inside toys.’ I haven’t had time to find the stupid pop bead jar.”
“25 cents please!”

“Mom?” calls the last one, as Nonna steps over to observe and listen, with patience and encouragement.
“Yes dear.”
“What’s dat ……hard…….shape…….chest?”
“I stuffed my i-phone down my bra as I haven’t had a chance to buy one of those cover clip things and my stupid trousers are already full because I haven’t got any pockets on any of my stupid clothing!”
“Tell er!” urges Nonna to my son.
“Tell er dats 50 cents!”

"Yes Nonna?"
"I tink dat old jar is too small for a swear jar."
"Which jar?"
"Dah old Pop Bead Jar."

Oh for a pocketless, pantfree, penniless life!


Kaber said...

You need some Cargo Pants with big pockets!! LOL

Almost American said...

LOL! DH is always annoyed at me when we go out somewhere and I hand my keys to him to put in his pocket because I have neither pockets nor a handbag.

Niksmom said...

Methinks you were set up by Nonna!!

Osh said...

Nonna is a sly one!

Jayne said...

Nonna's got your number alright!

Anne said...

you might need b-cups for storage if you're not going to have stupid pockets.


mommy~dearest said...


Patois said...

A tool belt. That's what you need! On the up side, you'll surely be able to pay for their higher education with all that money you're stashing away.

Anonymous said...

I've come to the point in my life where I actually check that pants have pockets before I purchase them. It is a higher priority in my life that they have a pocket than how my butt looks in the pants.

Joker The Lurcher said...

this is brilliant! and so like what happens to me all the time with the jar thing. maybe a bum bag or whatever they are called in america (butt-bag?)...