At 5:15 in the morning I am busy sautéing onions in the kitchen. The boys read comic books in the family room, a direct consequence of the new campaign ‘no electronics in the morning.’ Their holiday plan is to skip sleep completely to gain more electronics time. I took a leaf out of my mother’s book, the one that reads ‘do try and get some rest dear,’ with subtext that says ‘enough is enough.’ It’s not a perfect solution, more of a holding pattern when Nonna appears, “ooo wot you do dere? You’re making lunch already?”
“No ….supper. I’m trying to get ahead.”
“When you cook lunch den?”
“I won’t cook, just sandwiches.”
“Dat’s a pity. Wot we do today den?” I’m tempted to say ‘tread water’ or just ‘cope.’
“Take a swim, do some crafts……the usual.”
“Dat’s a pity. I tink I watch dah news den please?” I take a deep breath and take a small stand, “could you watch it later, when the boys aren’t here please?”
“No news? Why?” It’s my best shot, appeal to her highly superior Grandmotherly sensitivities.
“Because all that carnage upsets the boys, the children, it scares them.” I don’t mention that it probably also scares the neighbours too at 50 decibels before dawn.
“Oh yes. Of course. I see. Just a coffee den please?”
There! That was easy.
4 hours ago